My focus lately is on making my workday as happy, peaceful, and productive as possible. I have always taken everything very seriously. I want to lighten up and enjoy life! In order to lighten up, I am learning how to set boundaries that honor who I am. I used to have to “tune out” when I stepped onto the dog show grounds. For me, there was just too much stimulus – demanding people, dogs, and my own high inner drive to win.
At the end of a dog show, I was often exhausted, depleted, frustrated, and sometimes angry. The clients and dogs had sucked the life out of me. And so, I’ve been working on changing some of the things that aren’t working for me. One of the things that I have learned to do is to state what my boundaries and needs are without feeling guilty. I have been pleasantly surprised by how often I stated a need to a client and found they were happy to honor my request.
Last summer I had six shows in four days. On back-to-back shows, during the all-breed shows I also had independent specialties running. On the second day, I had a very talkative client that put her crate in my set-up. I went back to my set up to have lunch, relax and prepare myself for the next specialty. At the set-up, this one client continued to talk non-stop. I took a deep breath and said, “Excuse me. Would you mind giving me a bit of space? I really need some clear, quiet space so I can center myself and get myself and my dogs prepared for the specialty.” To be honest, I did feel a bit guilty, and hoped that I didn’t offend her, yet I knew I had to accept who I was… and if she just keep talking I was going to be really frustrated going into the next specialty. The funny thing is… my client wasn’t offended at all. In fact, she seemed to respect the fact that I wanted to be at my best for my clients and dogs! And so I invite you to join me in, let’s honor our boundaries and ask for we need in a loving way to create a more enjoyable dog show environment.
Published in Professional Handlers Association, Q3-2018-RHP NEWSLETTER-Setting-Healthy-Boundaries